Classic:
* Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
* Chuck Norris can win a staring contest with a statue.
* Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
* Chuck Norris can hear a pin drop... even in a vacuum.
More Recent:
* Chuck Norris doesn't need Google. Google needs Chuck Norris.
* Chuck Norris can count to infinity... twice.
* Chuck Norris can make a left turn at a red light.
* Chuck Norris can win a game of chess in two moves: 1) He eats all of your pieces. 2) He stares you down until you resign.
* Chuck Norris can make a salad cry.
Bonus:
* Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
* Chuck Norris can light a fire with two ice cubes.
* Chuck Norris once ate a whole pizza in one bite. He didn't even need to use his hands.
Remember, the best Chuck Norris jokes are the ones that are ridiculous and outlandish. Don't be afraid to get creative and come up with your own!