Gramma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas Eve
Xerox copies of her perming coupon
Were found scattered at the scene of the crime
(Verse 2)
X-rays and CAT scans could prove no brain damage
Gramma was as crazy as she ever was before
She just said
"I can't believe
That freaking reindeer
Ran me down"
(Verse 3)
The funeral was held Christmas Day
A bagpiper played Amazing Grace
Grampa got drunk and crashed his sleigh
They should've called a cab instead
(Verse 4)
Now he's in the intensive care unit
Suffering from frostbite
And Gramma's stocking's empty because
X-mas came and went
(Verse 5)
We had a sad, sad, Christmas
Without Gramma and with Grampa in a cast
But we knew somewhere
Gramma was watching us
Laughing hysterically
(Verse 6)
She'd never miss a chance like that
To show her love for us all